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Saturday, May 22, 2004 Beeps, Bones, Booze, & Blushes    Today I rode along with Master while he ran errands. I was in the backseat with my head out the window, taking in the summer breeze, when suddenly I was startled by car horns going off behind us. We had recently left the recycler where we dropped off more than a dozen empty wine bottles (how green of us, eh?). I thought maybe drivers were alerting us to an unclosed trunk lid or something, I didn't know. But nope, that wasn't it. I looked up and there, curbside, were two Asian children waiving multi-colored signs, one which read: "Honk If You Love Jesus!" The other advertised a car wash going on at a nearby Presbyterian Church. Master didn't honk, mostly I guess because we've never met Jesus so it would be pretentious, at least, to indicate we love him, but also because right about then Master burst out laughing. For some reason that whole vignette (per Uncle Dave) scene  -- two Asian Presbyterian children on an Alaskan street corner, begging beeps for Jesus and flagging dirty SUVs into a Presbyterian Church lot -- seemed utterly incongruous, out of place somehow.   Later we stopped at Mr. Prime Beef to score a few beef marrow bones for me to chew on. All they had were the ten inch-ers, so Master hack sawed 'em in half so I could easily tongue out the marrow from both ends. Gotta love him. Being that Mr. Prime Beef is only a few blocks from Brown Jug, where Tom The Pusher works, we of course had to stop by for a hello and a bottle of wine -- a scrumptious Australian Shiraz as it turned out. Oh yeah, back at Mr. Prime Beef Master tried flirting with a pretty attractive upright as he waited to check out. She was window shopping the butcher case display looking for ground buffalo meat, but then disappointed to hear they didn't have any. Master piped up and suggested she try the chicken, "Their fryers are always fresh here, and you can buy individual pieces too." He was kind of looking her up and down, noted her nice legs, then teased her by asking, "I prefer thighs, how about you?"   Okay, okay, maybe the double entendre was a bit over the top, but I'm pretty sure I saw her blush on the way out to her car. 10:25:36 PM    Comments disabled © Copyright 2009 Rufus. Nonsense, distribute widely and freely! Last update: 6/30/2009; 11:26:05 PM.			Readers Amused       Home About Me Airedale Philosophy How this all got started       FAQ What's an Upright? Upright: noun : a by and large bipedal companion, also referred to as a human being. What's a Cheechako? Cheechako: noun : a person new to Alaska who has come with the intention to live here. Who's Master? Master: pronoun : just the finest upright on the face of the earth, that's who! To read him is to love him. What's Dogdom? Dogdom: noun : Life's venue from a dog's point of view. What's a Sourdough? Sourdough: noun : A long time Alaskan who has an automatic suspicion of cheechakos. What does Outside mean? Outside: noun : A provincial reference to somplace other than Alaska; usually the lower 48. What's Breakup? Breakup: noun : A uniquely Alaskan season between winter and spring when the snow and ice begins to melt for good. Where is SquareBanks? SquareBanks: slang : A self-evident euphemism for a place widely known as Fairbanks, AK. Where can I read the Houston Trip? Houston Trip: vignette : Here What digital camera do you use? Camera: hardware : Canon Powershot A80 (4.0 MP) Who's Mom? Mom: Hottie : Have A Look What's a Squeakamunka? Squeakamunka: noun : your ordinary gray squirrel which can be seen everywhere in our Cleveland neighborhood! « Alaska Blogs »  Stories Fiction Boy Wonder Bat Girl Objects in Mirror Are Larger Than They Appear Used To Be Fish Skin Deep Essay Life Is Good Desert Nostalgia A Voice of Reason Fictional Four Realms of Darkness Poetry Lucky Chain  The Cycling Pages 1999 Canadian Tour 2000 Tour of Alaska "Yooper" : 2001 Tour of WI/Michigan UP 2001 Spine of Italy Tour 2002 Tour of New England 2004 Tour of New Zealand (coming soon!) 2005 Tour Of Nova Scotia Conways Game of Life (needs java plugin) Sometimes Interesting Billy Greg (Hiatus) Virginia Postrel Wendy McElroy Samizdata Atlantic Monthly Reason No Treason Slashdot Derke Lowe Heather Champ (Photo blog) T.C. Boyle Liquid Generation Improved Clinch Exquisite Corpse, A. Codrescu Fred On Everything Assymetrical Information The Daily Ablution (Hibernation) Lileks Frank Kelly (Hiatus) Up In Alaska